Road taken.

It has been really hard for me to focus on just one thing lately. I have been so distracted- not in a bad way either- but life is just crazy. I don’t understand anything. I have a lot of questions and I lack all of the answers. My heart and mind are torn between my will and God’s will for my life. It is far from simple. Every decision I make has a direct impact on my life and my future. What if I make the wrong choice? What if I choose poorly or selfishly? What if I settle for something good instead of pursuing great? I know that where I am right now doing what I am doing is exactly where I’m supposed to be…for now. The problem is my heart still aches for more. I am still unsettled with the desires deep within my soul. More than anything, I just want to see people’s lives changed. I know what my dreams are. But this question begs me to answer this: what does God say about any of it? I cannot help but include God in this conversation with myself. I believe he knows best for my life. Am I really  listening? Am I really obeying? I can’t separate these questions from my reality. I think and wait and pray, hoping that I might find the road I am meant to take.

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