I had to write this separately. My mind cannot not cease to think about this. Last night we stayed at the Bedouin camp and was something I needed for some time. I loved everything, yes, but this one thing touched me greater than anything else on this trip thus far. The stars. Why would the stars matter so much when I can see the stars back at home?
I love the stars. I love to star gaze. It is quite simply my favorite thing to do. I think clearly. I pray. I sing songs to God- songs I just make up and sing from my heart. I have seen the night sky in the mountains, in Florida, at home in Jersey, in Colorado, Alaska, and honestly the list goes on. But this time was very different. I walked away, alone, from the Bedouin camp, leaving all behind- my friends, the warmth, the noise. I walked away alone. I walked to the other side of a hill in the desert. It was dark. All around me remained the rocks and sand on the ground, the hills, the chilly air, and the starry night. I could hear off in the distance a soft sound resounding- the camp.
All I could do was gaze. I could do nothing else. I lost track of time, and frankly I didn’t care. I needed escape. I needed solitude. I didn’t need it because of something bad or anything like that. But what I found was greater. As I stood there, in the middle of the desert, I gazed at the perfect sky. When I say “perfect sky”, I mean it. There were no clouds, no pollution, no planes, and no other lights. I could barely see the light from the camp. Over the hills, I could see some light from Jerusalem. I gazed up into the vast unknown. And that is when it all hit me. I was gazing at the stars, in the same place where Abraham had been. At one point in his life, God told Abraham to look up and count the stars. Those stars would be the number of his descendants. I was blown away. All of my years of star gazing, I finally understood something so profound through my experience. God made a promise- a covenant- to Abraham that he would have descendants. Those stars are the constant reminder. Even further, as I stood there in the desert, the world never felt bigger. I, too, have been wanting a promise of something, however it is something unknown. Those stars remind me also of God’s promise in my life and what he is going to do. There is such a big world out there full of the promises God has for me. I wept. I cried out to God for all that I know he has for me. Those stars were beautiful, absolutely stunning. Perfect. God has something so beautiful for me too. I need not worry about my future- my husband, job, finances, or anything else. God is promising me something beautiful. I embrace it.